Peep Show

It was a lack luster dinner.  Veggie fried rice from TJ with tidbits of tofu.  Mixed vegetables for Spence, cheese for Nora.

The rice was rejected.

In the end, Nora only ate shredded cheese and five bites of raw tofu.  Spence was the champ--"I only want to eat mixed vegetables."  And he did.  Approximately 8 ounces of 'em.  He then tore into the raw tofu.

I admit.  Part of me was so disgusted by what they ate (Seriously?  Is that even a meal?) and felt guilty that they were eating components of foodstuffs rather than a proper recipe.  Boring food eaters.  The least I could do for the one kid that ate enough to approximate a complete meal was to offer a piece of Easter candy.

A Peep.  A pink Peep bunny.

I set Nor up in the other room counting her four pennies and called Spence back to the table.  "Look on your plate!"  I was anticipating cries of joy.

He looked down at the lifeless peep.  He kind of poked out it.  "What is it?"

"A Peep.  Well, a marshmallow.  Covered in pink sugar?"  I actually am not sure what a Peep is exactly.

"Candy?  Candy?  I only eat healthy food."  He left the Peep on the plate and ran off.

A few seconds later, he darted back into the kitchen.  "I have an idea of what I can do with that unhealthy food, Mom."  He picked up the Peep and unceremoniously plucked it in the trash can.

I have become quite obsessed.  In a quiet way.  I stare and stare at my children and wonder if they look like my donor dad.  And wonder if there are traits that did not show up in me (or my sister?) that might be showing up in them.  The question of nature vs. nurture shifts when you don't know half of of your genetic makeup.

I have been seeking memoirs of people that are in my situation.  I have only been able uncover the perspective of late teen, early twenties girlfolk that have been living with their knowledge of their 'donor dad' and 'social dad' for some time.  It's different when you have kids.  It's different when you are older and the process was much more hidden.  I suppose that many people who are like me might not realize that we are so alike.